She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
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