i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize