How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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