so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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