remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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