I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
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I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
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That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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