he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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