in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
