Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
