I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
