Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize