So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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