After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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