idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
