I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
