i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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