At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
where does the pee come out of this thing
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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