I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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