He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
