Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
