Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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