Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
