Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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