i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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