he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
