Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum