If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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