Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
