Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
