we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
