My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
