brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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