How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
