At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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