absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
