Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
