Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I have fence marks all over my body
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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