So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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