I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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