Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
