4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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