is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
