The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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