yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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