Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
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