im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
