i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
