if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
