it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
