Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
